LONELINESS


What a horrible emotion. At times it can become so unbearable you find yourself doing things you may not normally think of doing. Going to a place you would normally never think of entering. Speaking with people you otherwise would not give the time of day to. Loneliness has been known to drive people insane; depressed and suicidal. This emotion also leaves the person destitute of sympathetic or friendly companionship; exiled. Let me share my testimony with you about my bout with loneliness. I had been married for many years; my marriage was not successful from the beginning; however, because I was married that was the gold ring for me. All of but one year of my marriage I spent separated from my husband; I did not let it get the better of me because I was married; he chose me to have his last name; have his children and wear his ring. He always made sure that we had nice homes and cars but he never came home. Then I got critically ill and he never called or came to visit me while I was in the hospital or at home. I made up my mind that I was so much better than this and that he had left me and divorced me in his emotions along time ago. I got a legal divorce and the moment I received my final divorce decree I began to sink into a depression (I suffered from that anyway). This depression lasted longer than any I had ever experienced from there my duties as a wife towards her husband reared its head. Not being married I was beginning to go nuts. At least when I was separated; I could go to my husband for comfort. Now I don’t have anyone any longer. For two years I sank deeper and deeper into depression and loneliness; I cried daily. Then I decided to do the unthinkable for me; I tried on-line dating. I had hit a new low and came off desperate for attention. When I gave that up I met my second husband. I saw and heard in him all the things I wanted to see and hear from him. The thing is; he never said the things I needed to hear; I just thought he had. He did not meet my requirements for a male physic; I just thought he had. I was lonely and desperate. I’m certain he realized that and he took advantage of it. That marriage lasted 11 months and I divorced him. I had a severe mental breakdown; it took three months for me to come to my senses. In those three months GOD was performing surgery on me; HE delivered me from all those demons. I was set free from anger; depression; suicidal tendencies; oppression and un-forgiveness. Once I began to walk in victory; I got my bounce back; I came back from the ashes. However, during all of that I always knew that I was not alone. I often told myself that GOD will never leave nor forsake me. Being alone is much different from being lonely. If you are or you think you are experiencing loneliness; run quickly to the throne of GOD and with your whole heart ask HIM to deliver you from that. Ask HIM to replace that loneliness with whatever you need from HIM that is in The Word which will give you victory. The best thing to ask for after salvation is to be baptized in The Holy Spirit and to also have the fruit of the spirit. There are times when you need someone to speak with; it’s in those times that you can’t find anyone. You may need a friend at 2, 3, 4 AM; yet you don’t call because it’s too late and the person is asleep. GOD is never asleep; talk with HIM; ask of HIM in JESUS name. HE is there for you. When you call, The LORD will answer. “Yes, I AM here.” Isaiah 58:9                             Loneliness and depression will speak to you to cause you to think that no one cares. That is not true; GOD has, GOD does and GOD always will care for you. How precious are your thoughts about me (the reader) GOD.  Psalm 139:17

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